You noticed them. Your world paused for a while. Your brain smiles. Your heart blushes. Your face awed. You’d swiftly adjust your anatomy to its presentable best. Your focus at the moment is exemplary, as the focus, if persistent across life, will make you the most celebrated human soul. You want their eyes to meet yours. When it does, you’ll move yours to everything around but them. You’ve had a split second contact.
This split-second contact, my friend, has delivered 1000 emotions. Now, You’re charmingly alert. You’re adorably nervous. You hang around. Your eyes are still ignorant to them. Your mind is racing to gauge how well you were acknowledged. You’re unclear, but your mind is clear of its demand. You drive a second contact. A failed attempt is the end of the story. But but but, a successful one will change you forever. You see curiosity. You breathe confidence. You smell a new beginning. This second contact will not let you sleep that night, positively. You’d reimagine the scene and embellish multiple theories of what this contact meant, a delightful analysis, backed with a playlist that helps to maintain the feel. You might have your own ways to describe this, like a flashy feeling of an obsessively strong, full of heart attraction.
I felt it first when I was 16. And every time I think about it or you think about yours, you’d have a smile on your face. We’ve all felt it, once. Some of us, multiple times. But what happens from here is absolutely subjective to each of the 7.6 billion people of earth. Some of us will give up pursuing this attraction. Some of us will not only pursue this attraction but also breathe their last together. And most of us will live between the above two situations.
There is so much written about love, the process, the situations, the associated emotions, et cetera. I ain’t a scholar (of this subject) to put forward another philosophy or theory. Rather, I just wish to voice out a simple question — Why does this most craved feeling often dwell into the most complicated of all?
Think about it! Many of us quote, “It’s complicated.” — Why? I love someone. That Someone loves me. And we live happily together. Simple right? What’s the complication buddy?
Love ain’t complicated, we make it complicated. Here’s why:
Case 1 — Clarity of thought: I love someone, but…
Whatever comes after that ‘but’ in all practical senses should immediately stop you from pursuing this love anymore. However, we tend to solve for this ‘but’. If you find your answers, there won’t be any ‘but’, Kudos!. Though many a time, we live & fight this ’but’ way too long, and it still remains unanswered. Sorry! It ain’t helping your cause. It’s like I love coffee but I am allergic to caffeine. I love coffee, but I can’t sleep after it. I love coffee but the kind I like ain’t available here. What does all of it mean? You can opt for tea, soda et cetera. But, as human minds we’d still try fighting the allergy, trying to sleep, and developing a taste for the available one. It ain’t wrong, you might succeed. Although, currently, skipping it will make your life much simpler, ain’t it?
Case 2 — Effortless: I love someone. That someone loves me. but…
This is the most prominent situation of all (for me, personally). The ‘but’ here affects your life, your career, your ambitions. Because it’s this moment of truth that decides how well you marry into the idea of companionship (a word, I was lately confronted with). Honestly, only if the ‘but’ solves itself effortlessly, on its own, will sort your life. You two will be a force like no other. However, if it doesn’t, then you’d hit a lag that is impossible to overcome, forget defying it. It’s like I love coffee, coffee loves me, but I am allergic, but I can’t sleep after it, but the kind I like ain’t available here. If you can effortlessly overcome the allergy, effortlessly intake coffee in morning hours, effortlessly choose another drink — then, consider yourself to be the luckiest on this planet. But if you’re feeling the allergy again & again, you’re living with insomnia, you’re compromising your coffee taste, then I think it’s just in good spirits to move on, however difficult it might seem now.
Case 3 — Unconditional: I love someone. That someone loves me. We live happily together. but….
Again, whatever comes after that ‘but’ will never ever solve for its own. In fact, it becomes the most important element that will dissolve your love, eventually. The most important aspect of human behavior is co-existence. We’re trained to co-exist, subconsciously, the day we’re born. Our most favorite co-existing humans are not the ones who make you comfortable but the ones you’re always comfortable with, irrespective of how they are. There isn’t a single human who’s perfect and apt with his/her deeds. We’re all flawed in some or another way. If you love someone unconditionally, you won’t find flaws, rather you’d find-correct them for your partner and vice-versa. I love coffee, coffee loves me, we enjoyed each other’s company but now I am allergic, but now I can’t sleep after that, but now the kind I like ain’t available here. You can expect these to solve on their own. As long as Coffee & I love each other, unconditionally, I will only have the decaffeinated one now, I won’t drink one with less than 8 hours to sleep, I will import an annual stock of the coffee I like. There is nothing more special than two people in love going out of their way to make it work.
Love is special. Love is rare. Love is real. Love is influential. I don’t believe it is complicated at all if we seek clarity of thought, make it work effortlessly, and pursue it unconditionally. Trust me, it owns the power to make you the happiest, the strongest living being on this planet, what are you waiting for?
After all, I am love and I only wish to love my existence.
For now, these lovelies below will help me remember my love. Happy Valentines Day :)