I am a new year’s resolution, I hate my existence.

It’s almost the end of the year and you stare deep at the sunset by your window. You stare deep at the glass filled with high or caffeine. You stare deep at your couch and the shape it took by your softest organ. You stare deep at that piece of intellectual inspiration on your social media timeline. You stare deep at your work desk and the pseudo-analysis of your happy v/s sad quotient in life. You stare deep at that fan on the ceiling which is relentless at its job. You stare deep at those weights & cardio equipment in the gym which never stood true to your expectations.

Basically, the deeper you stare, the deeper you’re pretending to think or maybe genuinely thinking, and up next is almost a blitzkrieg chain reaction of aspirations. This is the day you make promises. If ever you made them in abundance to your own self, it’s today. And a fancy term is brought to life. It’s called *drum rolls* the New Year’s Resolution.

Irrespective of your age, gender, height, weight blah blah, you would surely have a resolution. Either you’re vocal about it or you’ve formally approved it in your head with a visible nod to the world.

So what really goes south with these resolutions? Let’s go step by step.

Question1 — Why “New Year’s resolution”? Why can’t this be any other day or every day?

Babylonians made promises to their gods at the start of each year that they would return borrowed objects and pay their debts. The Romans began each year by making promises to the God Janus, for whom the month of January is named. And when you were born, by the time you could understand the world around you, this was an important action/deed/chore that you needed to perform as per norms. Hence, I exist.

Question 2 — What are the types of resolution you seek?

The categories are from casual to serious. The casual ones generally eat healthily, lose weight, bum your laziness, take a bath every day, avoid over shopping, avoid social media (the biggest lie, ever!), basically changing your lifestyle. The serious ones are learning something new, getting rid of a phobia or habit, take a path-breaking career move, basically changing your life minus style. Now, some folks are true to those words actioning their plan, while some would just restrict these announcements on their social media statuses. Period.

Question 3 — What goes wrong?

To understand this, let’s think about what goes right first? I’d say it’s the end of year weather (winters), the aura of that festive mood, the power of good vibes in the air, and when more than half of your world is on holidays. Basically, you chill and the world around you is also chilling. And you perceive the planet you live in to be awe-happy, awe-inspiring. And in this very happy state of your brain, you start thinking about yourself (the very limited time you do, otherwise), your life goals, the good, the bad. And the basis of this analysis, you’d draw a plan of action called me (the resolution). So, what goes wrong is when this is over, your world goes back to the normal, the mundane, the daily. And not just you, it is absolutely the same as the world around you as well. And I am expecting you to proactively understand the ‘What goes wrong?’ Part here. When you get back to the mundane, how do you expect to action a word as heavy as a ‘resolution’?

Question 4 — So, What to do?

I’d say evict the ‘New year’ bit from that overhyped phrase. You don’t have to decide on this very day how you’d make your life better. C’mon! you can own a resolution even right now or even mid-year or quarterly blah blah. And to think beyond, why do you even need one? Why do you need a promise to upgrade/uplift yourself? Promises are good enough to create a benchmark in your cranium. It’s like a time bomb. Eventually, 90% of the time, it leaves you with agony, anxiety, regret, guilt — blah blah. But, that shouldn’t stop you from making one though, only if you strongly believe that they are meant to be broken :p.

And Yo! None of the #Gyaan above should stop you from thinking, planning, plotting, charting your 2021 resolution. Go ahead and make 100s of them at least. And I think you should, beyond listing them, make one at the end of each day, week, month as well i.e. If it helps you make your life better.

While in my opinion, I think I am more of banter within your universe, also as part of your coffee/alcohol sessions. You don’t officially need me to achieve anything that you aspire. You’re the smartest soul on this planet, it’s about time you stop thinking, start existing, and take everything you want to change — mile by mile.

After all, I am a new year resolution and I do not wish to hate my existence.